Character Choices and Draco Demands Many Cyndaquil!

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Draco has been working on his novel. It’s turning out fairly well. A part of Draco wants to take it into a game(a la visual novel or rpg( Kind of like those Lonely Wolf Treat games Draco always recommends to you.)) but for now it’s about getting the story out. Also That’s like twice the typing when Draco isn’t even half way to the middle. It’s not that Draco isn’t writing much, it’s that Draco like to let characters do essentially whatever they want. Draco rewatched the first episode of Inuyasha the other day and the sequence of events pretty much describe exactly what Draco means. So Kagome gets attacked by a demon, dragged through time, and finds a guy pinned to a tree with an arrow. She notices the guy has cute doggy ears and instead of doing what you’d expect and helping the guy even slightly or just assuming he’s dead and worrying that the space that was once her back yard was now a forest she decides “Hey! I want to touch those ears.”. It would have been a whole lot easier to have her go “Oh no! This Strange Dog Boy needs my help” and have her accidentally free the initially angry half-demon but nope. So Draco went on a herding cat trial. It takes longer when one character decides they have to go backwards because they want that one thing or instead of finishing an objective they get a new one but oh well. It’ll get there.  Especially once more characters join the group.

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^She’s our only hope.

Anyway now that December is almost over Draco needs to find a December challenge.  Well technically Draco could just do whatever. Finishing( AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA) November’s could be a thing but a drawing one would be preferable. Draco can hardly listen to any of the music he has while writing because either lyrics, catchiness, or violently different mood. It’s hard to write some characters when the music playing is their antithesis. While drawing though it doesn’t really matter as much. The catchiness thing still applies but few songs are that catchy. Draco did  find one or two good ones but one was marked as an October only challenge and the other was a thematic type of thing where you can write, draw, or do whatever the hell you want. Draco will probably just rebel against the October label and maybe apply the rest after. Other things Draco has to do include that Magical Diary( Which include replaying it because who can be bothered to remember stuff, right?) review, editing and recording stuffs, and catching a Cyndaquil.

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Draco’s first Pokemon, Draco’s favorite Pokemon.

Draco bought Pokemon Moon strictly because in the promotional stuff they said you can get a Cyndaquil. Draco thought it would be like Pokemon X & Y where they were so drunk on Mega-Evolution that they threw the original starters in your faces. “We didn’t come out with iconic enough starters this time around so if we want Mega-Evolution to succeed we better roll out the Charizard.”  was probably what they were thinking. X & Y definitely weren’t the best Pokemon games. Mostly the professor was creepy. Anyway it’s amazing how they added dialog choices, pokedex entries that suggest an actual ecosystem, and an entire year( an 11-year-old instead of the usual 10)!  Also they did that whole island atmosphere so well that Draco has spent more money on drinks than pokeballs. Clothing is pretty cool too btw. Draco bought sunglasses that according to Draco’s poor conversion rate memory would cost about $550-610 USD. That’s a stupid purchase and it’s pretty cool they got Draco to pull the trigger.

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In all the other games Draco ended up rich but here that seems unlikely and Draco is only about half way through. That’s the problem though. Draco now knows that you can only get Cyndaquil by scanning a group of 10 QR codes every 20 hours or so on the first island assuming you don’t get a different Pokemon. They offer all of the gen 2 starters and some other ones( supposedly it’s a group of twelve) but Draco’s been aiming for Cyndaquil since preording. Draco’s team composition is Cyndaquil based.  If Draco had learned how to get Cyndaquil before getting to the second island Draco wouldn’t have gone to the second island. It probably would have ruined the entire experience. At this point Draco refuses to go to the third and it’s been several days. Draco really likes where the story is going but if Draco waits till the end to get a Cyndaquil it will just be a disappointment. Probably! Draco assumes it will be because everything after Crystal has been but maybe this will be different. Draco remains safely skeptical so Draco shall keep trying but the random nature is slightly disappointing. Draco did order a plush Cyndaquil off Amazon though so don’t worry no one needs to die yet. It is based on Hawaii though and Hawaii has volcanoes. kicking someone into one to jump-start the Cyndaquil process would be a nice option. Admittedly Draco would feel to guilty to do anything at that point but haha murder humor. Oh that reminds Draco of another thing! So now wild Pokemon can call for help. Sometimes the help doesn’t come. This makes Draco pretty sad most of the time; the poor Pokemon need help, they call to their friends, and the friend is like nope. Draco usually lets them go. Draco would appreciate if one of them had a Cyndaquil friend and maybe for taking it easy on them they could say “hey go be caught by that guy” or if RNGesus could help Draco out here and drop a box of them in Draco’s lap.

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Source: http://fav.me/d3bw2i9

Draco Shows Off Stuff Again and Box Box

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Draco has a few ideas but Draco still has one of those “look at all this cool stuff” posts on the burner so that needs to be removed from the burner and served. Draco doesn’t remember enough of those running a restaurant reality shows to continue this metaphor. Stuff! Specifically birthday stuff.

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Everyone place your bets on what is in the box. You will probably never guess correctly but it’s important to keep the hope that lives in your heart alive! Guess with your full conviction!

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It was another box. A box inside a box. Let’s skip the obvious reference to the popular 2010 sci-fi movie, Tron: Legacy.

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Frisbee Golf The Movie

So now what was in the box’s box?

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It’s Myrtenaster from RWBY! Essentially a revolver rapier.  It’s heavier than you’d expect. The fins are probably sharper than the tip. It still stabbed the box pretty well. If Draco must ever fight cardboard warriors, Myrtenaster will be perfectly fine. Draco looks forward to finding a way to display it somehow.

Just one question.

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WHAT IS THIS BUTTON FOR?

It seems to serve literally no purpose whatsoever. Draco has pressed this button many times. Maybe every time Draco presses it a random person dies. Maybe an angel gets its brand new 2016 wings by Chevrolet. Maybe it forces you to hit like and subscribe hashtag winky face. Who knows?

We also have this beautiful RWBY MUG!

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It’s great, Draco really appreciates it, but There is a problem. To understand the problem you’d either have to watch the Rooster Teeth podcast or watch this much shorter animated short.

Now guess what Draco saw on the bottom of the mug? A sticker! Admittedly it’s just a little “China” sticker to say hey this is made in China but still. That’s like Oreo saying you’re not allowed to have milk with their cookies. Communication is key. If you’re going to say no to mug stickers make sure your company doesn’t put stickers on mugs.

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Other than that Draco just got a few of them ol’ Funko Pops and a cellular telephone which Draco hasn’t really used much because it’s scary.

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Anyway, here’s a question for you. With the advent of unboxing videos and reaction videos, do you ever feel like when you open or react to something without filming it that you rob yourself of content? It sours the experience a bit.

 

Witchapalooza: Witch Post Extravaganza!

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So apparently “Witchapalooza” may be a thing already for some restaurants. Witches Night can’t be used either because that’s April 30th apparently. Draco decided to use a colon and the word extravaganza instead.  Originally this was going to be a week-long extravaganza of witches but several things got in the way.

  1. Draco had a day trip the other day. Draco got some good pictures and discovered that McDonald’s Eggs are halfway decent in the sense that half the egg was decent while the other half was disgusting. Draco threw most of that half out.
  2. Draco struggled to come up with seven ideas. Draco will go over the remaining ideas but one of the better ones was quickly murdered. The idea was to talk about the origin of the typical witch design we see today. The very day Draco came up with the idea Draco went on YouTube, checked his subbox, and found this.

Like it doesn’t go over every little detail but it’s essentially the entire idea.

3. Halloween was on a Monday. That means the week of would have started on a Tuesday. That’s weird.

4. Draco was busy doodling nonsense.

So anyway let’s settle this here and now. First off Draco shall post the 31 witches Draco did for Inktober and Witchtober. Draco never missed a day by the way. if you follow Draco on Twitter you’ve already seen these but some people haven’t so boo.

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Draco wouldn’t just make a post to repost all of Draco’s posts though probably! You probably missed the witches that fell between the floorboards.

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Darkness Witch!

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Witch Draco from Magical Diary!

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Singing Witch!

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Owl Witch!

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Nature Witch!

 

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Mage Witch( Yes that sounds redundant)

 

 

 

And now for all the witches that weren’t in ink.

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A Blood Witch 

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A Summoning Witch

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Mami Tomoe from memory in under 30 minutes.

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Katrina the Mob Boss Witch (Also 30 minutes)

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A Book Witch.

So that’s about it on witches Drawn by Draco. While doing Book Witch’s little magical circle Draco looking for magic related stuff. Mostly Draco was trying to find a summary of sigils (Where you deconstruct the letters of a sentence and shove the little lines together essentially) so Draco could do some of that and make the circle really magic looking but it ended up being way too much. On the bright side Draco did find this cool witch on YouTube called Taty the Mighty . Not only is she a witch, she has great taste in anime, that url says tatyology à la tautology which is hilarious, she’s a big fan of boobs, Draco meant to type “books” but it isn’t a lie so Draco isn’t hitting backspace, and she has DID so that’s like 30 times the fun. #Variety #TheyreAllGreatFYI #ChickenForGarnet #WhenYouStartAListButYouOnlyHaveOneListPoint #FreudianTypo #Hashtag

As for other topics to cover, Little Witch Academia already got its review and Magical Diary will get a review some other day. We only have three more hours till the Witching Hour so it’s probably best to hit publish sooner rather than later.

Happy Halloween Everyone!shinychariot

This is a great gif.

 

 

Third Anniversaries and Stuff

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It’s Dracoblag’s third anniversary today! That means that Draco started Dracoblag THREE years ago. That’s equal to one year of time painted red. The third anniversary is the crystal/ glass anniversary. Does that mean anything here? Not really. There are lots of crystal things in final fantasy if you’re into that sort of thing.

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Pylons in Starcraft are essentially giant crystals.

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Rin Tohsaka from Fate/ Stay Night used some crystal magic.

Fate Stay Night Unlimted Blade Works Rin Tohsaka Kawaii Style Crystal Necklace Magic Anime Gaming cosplay jewelry

You can buy this here.

Draco when he was younger was into an anime called Glass Fleet.It got Draco into the concepts of Space Operas and french nobility sounding names. It was also probably the first show Draco watched where the villain was really cool but also totally irredeemable( an absolutely abhorrent inhuman being) while the mains were relatively unimpressive aside from their outfits( all of them were really cool). It was essentially a soap opera so it wasn’t reviewed all that positively in the annals of history but oh well.

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Epaulettes just look good  

If Draco remembers correctly when Draco took that quiz in Infamous Second Son Paper Trail (not really)viral marketing quiz it said Draco would have glass manipulation powers. Too bad that power was scrapped in-game.😦

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When Draco was little Draco loved the sound of glass breaking.

Glass armor in Skyrim and other elder scrolls games( which Draco didn’t play that much of) were generally the best looking.

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Why is there gold? Because cool. Because cool.

That’s probably about it. Happy Anniversary Dracoblag!

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We did it!

 

 

 

Draco reviews Little Witch Academia and the Name Shiny Chariot

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Draco watched Little Witch Academia the other day. It’s on Netflix. It was originally just a short but then they made another short and now it’s going to get a full series.  It was made by Studio Trigger aka the Kill la Kill and Space Patrol Luluco people. That essentially means it’ll be pretty good. The art style is essentially the same as all their other works but this one is of the adorable variety. One of the character is almost entirely redeemed by how cute their little familiar( cute little magical companion( usually an animal but in this case  it’s like a candle)) is.

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You were pretty much just a sidekick till you pulled that little sweetheart out.

The plot for the first short is essentially the first Harry Potter sans the overarching evil, the terrible home life, and the “Ur a wizard ‘Arry”. There is a main character, a side kick, an actual competent friend, a rival, and the rivals two sidekicks who are clearly outclassed by their master but hoot and holler anyway.To be fair that is a pretty standard setup and obviously shouldn’t be taken as a negative.

The short starts with the main character Akko being inspired by a performer named “Shiny Chariot”. She goes to Magical school to be like her hero but as anyone who read the words “Shiny Chariot” in the last sentence can expect  this draws ire and ridicule. Somehow she makes friends with straight-laced side kick Lotte (pictured above with the cute fire thingy) and the clearly better than everyone else but probably too intimidating to hang out with more competent people but oh well we don’t usually pick our friends by their level of competency Sucy Manbavaran( best character 10 out of 10). The trio then go on to do stuff you’d do at a magical school.

Sucy ended up being one of Draco’s Inktober/Witchtober Witches.

That’s about all you can say about the plot without spoiling at least the first part since it’s only an hour and a half at the moment( the first part being the half hour). What can be said is that it is a very solid well done story with only the necessary. They build a story and make you care about the characters better than some series with full seasons and bigger budgets. Draco looks forward to the series and highly recommends you catch up before the premiere. Coming January 2017 to a Netflix near you.

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As for criticisms Draco only has one point and after looking into it a little bit more it may not even be a point. So all of the people who talk about Shiny Chariot on the show refer to her as Shiny Chariot. Apparently she was so disliked by the witch community for being flashy that she had to go into hiding and change her name. Her name. This make Draco wonder was Shiny Chariot not just a stage name? Was her name ACTUALLY Shiny Chariot? All of the evidence and the way people talk makes Draco think that her actual name was Shiny Chariot. Now apparently her wand( it’s actually a rod but calling it a wand to begin with is easier) is called the Shiny Rod. This may mean that she was only called Shiny because of her use of the Shiny Rod OR the rod was named for her? There isn’t really clarification so potentially some witch family decided “Eh, you know what we should name our baby? SHINY!”. Even if that wasn’t the case there isn’t anything saying that her official last name isn’t Chariot. That’s more forgivable than naming your kid Shiny but still… It’s weird. This doesn’t detract from the experience though. It if anything makes Draco want to know more about the world. What in their culture would lead them to develop such odd names? It was kinda nice in RWBY when they explained why everyone had colorful names. Something like that for Little Witch Academia would be nice.

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More sparkly than shiny, really.

Sick and Complaining

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Draco is sick. Draco would just like to lay down right now. Draco made an amusing jest that Draco would just write the words “Draco is sick” forty-seven times and  have that be the week’s post. Writing a post shouldn’t have even been a problem because Draco already wrote a post reviewing Rimworld(spoilers: it’s great) but Draco doesn’t have the screenies set yet.

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Also Draco has a bad taste in his mouth. If Draco had to describe Draco would say it is the passage of time stealing one’s loved ones while one looks on through the space but as a taste. So like slightly too old. Very annoying.

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Oh and the My Mix feature of YouTube keeps putting not songs on. Draco wants background noise, not an explanation on the law of attraction. Upon further reflection that seems kinda ironic but Draco is still not happy about it!

What Draco is happy about is Draco found that brand of modeling clay that Draco likes. They redesign the box too often. Draco hasn’t opened it yet though because germs or whatever. Also Draco found the Iron Giant and that new Final Fantasy movie for cheap but Draco hasn’t had time.

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Luke Cage was really good though.Clap clap clap. Draco also caught up on another show but that fits with a post Draco plans for the end of the month so we can talk about that then.

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It’s annoying having very little to extensively talk about and then having those things be topics you want to cover later or that you aren’t set up to finish yet. That kinda makes Draco wonder how authors and game developers survive the creation process without just being super transparent.

Oh on that note Draco is doing some great characterization lately. Maybe Draco will do that whole NANOWRIMO thing. It’s a shame Draco doesn’t have a Word install on this comp. Word Online is essentially just Google Docs but slightly worse. If they’re going to release Word free for mobile then they should do it for not mobile too. >.< .

Another thing! If you can input text there should be an automatic spellcheck! Did you know that Photoshop has a spellcheck but you have to go find it in a menu if you want to use it. Is there a way to make it automatic? Probably not! If there is please tell Draco.

You’re probably wondering how much longer Draco can continue this sea of complaints, right?   Well that’s the plan Draco formed halfway through writing this. One hour of complain writing!

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Why is YouTube so incredibly stupid? They abuse the people who actually allow their company to run aka content creators, they worship advertisements even though their YouTube Red idea was built off the principle idea that their user-base hates advertisements so much they’d pay to have them stop, and they continue to step at Draco with advertisements and suggestions involving this YouTube Red even though a blind man who is also dead and in space could see that the platform along with essentially every other idea they’ve come up with in the past few years are all total failures.

Draco just started watching Daredevil. It’s cool but it’s kinda weird how the bad guys are using blinded slave labor. Maybe that was in the comics but it just seems out-of-place that the one superhero who is blind would just happen to be fighting the only villains who keep their victims compliant with blindness. Like imagine a one-armed superhero discovering a villain was using only people with one arm. It’s weird.

Why does Windows think desktop users want a lock screen and why does the lock-screen keep asking Draco to ask random questions? Why would Draco want to know how far away the Grand Canyon is? How about instead of making Draco pull up this sorry excuse for a screen saver you just let Draco use the computer and look it up for you? AND WHY DID YOU REMOVE GROUP POLICY EDITOR on some editions of windows 10? DRACO NEEDS THAT TO FIX YOUR GARBAGE DECISIONS more effectively and with greater control WINDOWS PEOPLE!

Why did a sad song have to come on just as Draco was getting fired up? That’s sad.

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Why is the sad song still on? Draco finished talking about it? *cries*

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IT’S STILL ON! *cries*

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How has the human race not created the perfect box yet? We have the tools but not the drive apparently. Think about it though. In every sci-fi future setting you can tell it’s the future because every single box has the same basic design. If we want to live in a future that’s the future we need to perfect our boxes.

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Why are there no really good procedurally generated murder mystery games yet? Why are there no really good murder mystery games where the killer changes between playthroughs? Why aren’t there more good regular mystery games? Most importantly why does Draco crave the opportunity to solve crimes on occasion? Draco blames psych for being a great show.

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Psych was removed from Netflix.

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Draco Dreams and Game of Shelves

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Draco had a dream the other night.

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The Draco in this dream was slightly different in that he had opened up a stall in front of his home similar to that of a lemonade stand and it was selling “be less awful coupons” and “the future” whatever that means. We open on Draco lamenting the lack of jars available to hold all the money from selling the futures and coupons. A mysterious man who is presumably one of this Draco’s business partners suggested that instead of storing money in jars we expand our demographic and purchase all the local rest stops. By forming a monopoly we could start price gouging and make bank. Banks are good places to store money sort of and even if that is just an expression we could probably use it as temporary storage till we go shopping. Draco seems hesitant but that doesn’t matter because Draco’s bodyguards have arrived and they say that Draco must leave for Town City immediately.

A bunch of those scene transitions from The Hills where they just show people driving to pad the time play.

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We arrive at the warehouse where Draco keeps his shelf. Draco and bodyguards enter through double doors dressed to the nines and all sunglassed up. It seems our dramatic entrance is for naught till we look over to the shelf and see essentially this guy.

“Hello, Draco. I’m a rich man and I’ve decided that I want to sit on this shelf all day. You see up until a few days ago this was the only shelf in the entire city I didn’t own. Now with the new law they passed I can sit here as much as I want.”

“What!?” The bodyguards barely hold Draco back as he lunges towards rich man. To be honest though he was only and this was some abandoned warehouse in the middle of nowhere so really they should have just offed the sod.

“Didn’t you hear? Any shelf that doesn’t have brownies on it is now considered public property. I certainly don’t see any brownies here so it would seem I’m free to do as I please.”

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“WE will see about that” Draco pulls up his sleeve to reveal a golden bracelet. It glows and peoples hair gets swept back because magical forces or whatever.”Therese the Demon Baker( She’s from the same story as Mallory and she’s been getting a lot of character development so she totes owes Draco a favor), you are hereby summoned to this realm!”. Blinding light or whatever clouds yadda yadda Therese appears.

“Heeeeeeeeello!♪ How may I help you?” Therese grins with the type of smile you use to sell pastries at exorbitant prices.

” Ah yes. We will be needing enough brownies to cover every shelf in this city.” Evil plan energy fills Draco’s pores in anticipation for the upcoming victory against the evil rich man.

“Um ok!♪ If this is a bulk order you will need to fill out some paperwork I have some of the forms on me” Therese rummages through a tote bag flinging up a storm of paper. It is unclear why Rich Man didn’t hear them talking or notice the rustling but oh well. Baking montage time. Filling out forms! Carrying ingredients! Oh no; someone covered themselves in flour! Eggs being cracked! Stirring! A watched brownie never boils! That’s important because you aren’t supposed to boil brownies. Everything being delivered! Team High five midair freeze-frame!

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“WHAT!? How did you cover the shelves in brownies!?” Rich Man stumbled backward in shock. He attempted to balance himself on a shelf but was repelled by the power of brownies.

“It looks like you underestimated Draco’s ability to pay people to bake for him. Rookie mistake.” This Draco was smug about this for some reason.

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“WELL WELL WELL WELL WELL YOU STILL HAVE DEFEATED MY ARMY OF SUPER TINY PEOPLE!” Apparently that’s a thing Rich Man has and cares about? Who would have guessed. Also he’s doing that weird tantrum thing that rich people do on TV.

“Like borrowers?” That’s what Current Draco was going to say too. Great minds.

“Yes like borrowers… Raise an army from your villages and meet me on this field again by the end of the month!” Rich Man probably didn’t understand this was a dream and we were just going to time skip.

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Draco returned one month later with a sizable band of viking looking miniature people. Rich Man was perches on a shelf-less rafter while his legion of very roman looking borrowers. The two forces clashed near the center of the room but Draco’s forces were pushed back quickly as the legionaries made short work of the under-equipped Draconian forces. Draco was doing pretty poorly, trying to fight with tiny weapons. Draco watched the tiny nameless people dying and it was all pretty traumatic.At some point though Draco remembered something.

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Draco is appalled at how long it took this Draco to remember that Draco could crush everyone. From then on it was all about saving everyone who came to help and then handling things the unfair giant way. It really didn’t take long… The council of tiny people decided that Rich Man would be burned at the stake for his crimes and everyone celebrated with brownies. The original problem of having nowhere to put all the money was solved by Therese taking all of it.

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And that was Draco’s dream.

 

Curbed Enthusiasm and Distraction Clouds

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So Draco was really excited to write a post about the magical adventure of having to pick up his diploma . It kinda spiraled out of control when it started becoming an animated comic. Honestly it wasn’t that interesting. Also the backstory where a person doesn’t understand how forms, the post office, giving out their email, and being a responsible adult works drags it into “Make Draco so angry he has to stop writing” territory… Ultimately Draco just needs to put it down on paper so Draco can go write about something else. Ideally Draco will write another post really soon and make up for all the breaks.:/

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Distraction Clouds!

So it all started with Draco putting on a shirt.Draco had the choice of putting on that shirt that fit from two posts ago or a comfy shirt from whenever Assassin’s Creed 3 came out.

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This is the shirt. It’s comfy and was on sale. So Draco goes in the sweltering heat and this is turning into an overly dramatic mess again oh no… On the way to the college Draco saw this mural for a community project or whatever. They had school kids paint the wall near the school. It appear that someone decided to paint what appears to be two priests being crucified with the world on fire in the background. Actually that might be the sun and the moon. Brown haired guy has really long legs.It’s probably depicting that form of torture where you stretch a person.

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This is how Danganronpa starts so stop it.

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Puhuhuhusee you soon!

So Draco departed world on fire land and eventually got to the waiting room.  It was essentially empty with one person in line and two people playing trashcan basketball but with kissing.

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It’s a strange sport

Eventually the line person finishes and it was Draco’s turn. Draco carefully quells what fury lies in his heart and Draco is greeted with a perfectly nice person. Draco expected the person to try to charge Draco a second time but no. They understood the situation and were super happy and positive and Draco was really feeling those positive vibes.Also they looked like Chloe from Life is Strange which is always appreciated. So Draco gets the diploma says thank you and then they say ” I love your shirt…”.This made Draco so HAPPY but sadly that punctuation is an ellipses.”Assassin’s Creed 3 really was the last good game ever made!” Ya Draco was a bit stunned. Draco had never actually heard someone say a single positive word about 3. Admittedly they could have meant last good game in the franchise or by Ubisoft but no it seems like she meant out of everything.Draco just had to smile and nod ya know. It’s like talking about Indian Jones and someone saying their favorite is the one with Shia Labeouf.  Curse the awkwardness. T_T

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And that’s the story.

Draco reviews The End( the Game, not the Movie, Book, Song, Poem, Sculpture, or Pet Turtle)

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Draco was delayed due to jumping and wanting to sleep. Honestly it’s better though because originally this post was gong to include a rant about sleep schedules and all that and no one really wants to hear that, right? AND NOW people were being loud so Draco lost his train of thought. AND AND NOW AVG DID THAT “FIX COMMON PROBLEMS” THING THAT NO ONE REALLY WANTS AND IT MADE DRACO LOSE HIS TRAIN OF THOUGHT ON A PARAGRAPH WHICH WAS SOLELY GOING TO BE ABOUT LOSING HIS TRAIN OF THOUGHT! WHEN WILL THE LOSING OF THOUGHT TRAINS END?

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Before we begin the review lets take a moment to appreciate that smooth transition.

So about The End… Go go press release ranger!

The End is a free, online web-game commissioned by Channel 4 Education, and scheduled for release in August 2011.

It is a game of self-discovery for 14-19 year olds which integrates strategy, puzzles and philosophical questions into a world which explores a range of commonly (or less commonly) held views about death, belief and science.

The game takes the player on a metaphysical journey, recording their interactions in the world to reveal their attitudes towards mortality. These views are presented alongside their friends and some of the most important thinkers of our time, such as Gandhi, Descartes and Einstein.

Set across three worlds – Mind, Body and Spirit – the player must use a unique shadow ‘n’ light mechanic to solve physics-based puzzles, answer questions and battle the world’s Guardians. The ultimate prizes are the Death Objects, ranging from a memorial diamond to a human heart, which deepen a player’s contextual knowledge of death and help them progress through the game.

The End is produced by award-winning games studio Preloaded with content from the mega brained Tom Chatfield (author of Fun INC). It has been illustrated with the ninja pencil skills of Luke Pearson and has an original score composed by Peter Mauder of Phonotheque. Additional consultancy has also been provided by Nigel Warburton (creator of the successful Philosophy Bites podcasts).

The End is this cute little browser game by @C4education / @Preloaded that asks those hard-hitting question about life and death and all such things. Also they have the best press release Draco has seen yet. That doesn’t really tell you about the game but it’s clear that the people behind The End are extremely helpful.  Literally the opposite of what a group trying to make The End in real life would be like. Also probably less cackling and self destruct switches. Thank you for padding Draco’s word count.

It was recommended to Draco as a device to test character morality. Basically you have your character go through the quiz and blah blah blah self discovery. It really doesn’t work well for that task. It’ll probably take around 4 hours more or less to finish and that’s impractical if you have a giant cast. There may be a way to change it all after you finish but that’s no fun. You want to do things right you make each character a seperate profile.  Anyway…

Story

To start off with you make a cute little avatar of yourself and then you’re expected to walk in a line. This section took Draco about 10 minutes because what if there is suddenly a secret back the other way? The screen will gradually shake more and more until the world seems to end and then you get yelled at by Super Buff Meat Boy, Puff the Magic Dragon Man, and Pink Mouth Cthulhu. Then you go on a journey to convince these three to give you all their stuff.

Gameplay 

So when Draco was told to play this Draco expected moral questions and moral questions but most of the game is jumping puzzles.

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They do have a cute little walk on shadows mechanic which lets you make shadows into solid platforms which you or objects can be supported by but most of the game takes place in areas too bright to actually use it. Most of the time you’re pulling levers, climbing ladders, and jumping from platform to platform to avoid spikes. Sometimes you have to aid boulders in their journey to hold down pressure plates. On your jump journey you’ll encounter a keys with some lovely quotes and at the end of each stage a set of doors.theend4

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These doors come with moral questions( Yay!) which could take you anywhere up to 4 minutes or so to answer. Beyond these doors lies one of the three apparent guardians, Super Buff Meat Boy, Puff the Magic Dragon Man, and Pink Mouth Cthulhu, who will then play some sort of board game with you. The stakes are thankfully low because if they actually wanted Draco to go do the entire level over again just for a single bad hand of tiles then this review would just be Draco ranting and screaming instead of a review style review.

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So you pick little bonus powers, a hand is generated, and aside from the numbers it’s basically Othello. You try to flip your opponents pieces by having a higher number .Ideally you think ahead and understand what tiles can flip your tiles and then wear the opponent down until they have no moves left but at later stages they may be able to obscure their tiles as seen above. If you’re fast enough you can see what the tile has before they play it but that’s sorta cheaty. It’s fairly straight forward overall.

Other Stuff

One of Draco’s favorite part of The End was the little bios for each object.

Admittedly it’s a little weird. There doesn’t really seem like there is a point to them story-wise. Like if there was a way to drop one and then you did drop one but no one noticed the story probably wouldn’t be affected.

The best part of The End though is the Death Dial.

Watching the little dot move as more questions were answered and seeing the most like section change from Karl Marx, to Winston Churchill,  to Rosa Parks, and finally to Indira Gandhi was quite entertaining. The Crusader/ Awakener/ Truth-teller / Mystic stuff was also enjoyable but comparing yourself to famous people is always the most fun.

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This armor is so cool looking though.

The comparison is the draw and what will make you think back on the experience ultimately. Draco had fun even though platformers are Draco’s least favorite playable genre.Jumping from platform to platform can apparently be enhanced with philoshpy apparently.

The Future May Twist and Turn but Don’t Lose Your Way Towards Staying Fresh With the Cavalry

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Draco went to the merchants the other day to buy their wares. Warning this will mostly be Draco bragging about stuff Draco bought. On the way there Draco learned that some people can apparently bend infinitely. Draco saw a car accident result and the poor guy was twisted around. Spine had to have been spring shaped, oh and his one leg had a brand new knee below his regular knee. Draco suspected he was dead but then a few minutes later the guy was walking around. Not a visible scratch on him. Twas magic apparently.

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Anyway Draco went into this one anime store. Draco is always feeling terrible when Draco goes in this store but that’s not their fault. Same thing happens any time Draco talks to an adviser. They had stuff and of course Draco wanted a lot of it but Draco isn’t willing to drop $200 on not actually metal swords, Draco has too much shame to buy a boob mouse pad( though Draco needs an actual mouse pad so it would have been an actually practical purchase), wall scrolls need somewhere to hang, the plushies weren’t appealing enough,  and all of the costumes would have looked ridiculous on Draco so Draco just grabbed a shirt and some blind bags. This cashier was much better than the one Draco met at this store the last time and she convinced Draco to buy two additional bags. It was $15 for 2; $20 for 3… The shirt didn’t fit even though it was a large but Draco isn’t feeling bad because at another store Draco bought a size medium and it fit. Clothing makers need to get their act together. All in all check out the cute future of music Miku!

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Draco tried to make this one look hologram-y without making many selections. It was Miku’s birthday the other day so be sure to wish her a happy one.

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The bottom Miku had lighting issues which is why she got the solo shot. The only reason this didn’t get cropped more was to save a pic and show off Helena. Helena is the best yo. Be sure to watch Orphan Black since it’s better than whatever show steals Best Actress from Tatiana Maslany.

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So then Draco went in search of refreshment, as one does on a hunt. Yadda yadda stuff blablah Draco came upon another provider of goods. The contents of the shop reminded Draco of that one store Draco went to where the shopkeeper told Draco to go away since Draco obviously couldn’t afford any of the obviously high price items( worthless knockoff garbage) in his tiny cubical shop but this shop was bigger with more items and better staff. As Draco was respectfully greeted by a proper shopkeeper Draco noticed the same item that had caught Draco’s eye earlier. Admittedly wooden rather than plastic but oh well. Super cheap anime related sword and they had a two for one special since it was part of a set.

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Every time Draco looks at this Draco laughs. What a totally nonsensical purchase.

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Credit to PonyLord

It may not be perfect but it was cheap and it does exist so ultimately Draco is happy with the purchase. The scissorblades are some of the most iconic swords of recent anime so Draco is glad to have them. Well even if they weren’t iconic Draco would be happy with just about anything Kill la Kill related.A real one like they made on Man At Arms Reforged would have been preferable but way more expensive.

Then Draco just went to Barnes and Noble s and picked up some of the usj.

Oh and the other day Draco picked up some of them amiibo the ebays are always talking about. Callie and Marie are truly squidtastic.

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“Stay Fresh”

And then way before that Draco picked up this Tracer Pop

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“Keep calm and Tracer on!”

Draco wasn’t going to share this one since it was a while ago but Draco spent too much time making her chronal accelerator shiny and lit.