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Witch-2017-31-Knife-Witch-Run

Draco did Witchtober again therefore it’s time for the wrap up post like last year. This year it’s late because Draco did too many things and most of those things will go unused.  Draco will now repost all of the witches that actually got posts and then maybe elaborate on them because 140 characters hasn’t been enough for most of them.

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Heroic Witch sticks the three-point landing with a Reaper-looking owl.

Pretty standard. It was nice how the outfit made it so Draco didn’t have to draw a second foot. The owl was going to be a hawk but the Reaper owl is easier.

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Bubble Witch is bubble zorbing. Maybe she’s off to buy some bubble tea with all the money she makes on redbubble.

Basically the idea was bubbles.

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Android Witch appreciates the magical beauty of nature.

The magic was a Konosuba reference.

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Traffic Cop Witch barely needs the sign with top-notch telekinetic hand signals. Definitely didn’t cause an accident again.

Basically the idea was telekinesis stopping traffic accidents but not every good idea is a success.

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Middle Management Witch thought getting promoted would make them happy. Middle Management Witch was wrong.

This is actually Urban Witch from last year. Next year she’ll probably be upper management or better but will that bring her happiness? Probably not.

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METAL WITCH IS LIVING IN METAL ALL DAY, AND ALL NIGHT! METAL WITCH SWEATS AND BREATHES METAL! METAL! RAAAAAAAAAA!

It’s armor plus the musical genre. They got the cool mask because Draco messed up on the mouth. The hair ended up really nice and the armor is pretty ok. The book is a reference to the Mad Magician MAGES..

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Cyberpunk Witch can select her spell with a convenient magic app.

Draco liked the outfit and another outfit so Draco combined them. When Draco looked up cyberpunk it was mainly just people wearing ordinary clothes; nothing special. This one did help Draco start working on a sort of magic internet/technology for Draco’s world building. It works better than the previous idea of “There are just some areas with tech and the rest don’t have it.”. Some areas still won’t have access while others have extremely high-tech stuff but this is a helpful healthy medium. Plus the way Draco has mana working it’s basically WiFi so this was a happy conclusion. Draco isn’t sure why more people don’t do it this way because it makes the conservation of ninjutsu more reasonable.

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Lich Witch is allowed to wear cute clothes! Lich Witch is allowed to be happy! Stop bullying Lich Witch!

Draco likes liches but they are so often portrayed in their bare bones form. A magic user with enough skill to become a lich should easily be able to repair flesh or at the very least create new flesh to graft on. Sure healing magic hurts undead but the grafting idea would work in that case. A lich can be cute if they wants to be!

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Haberdasher Witch is… pretty normal actually. She uses magics to make hats and accessories sometimes.

Draco based his magic system on aesthetic and understanding oneself so a Haberdashery would probably do good business. But perhaps her business is doing too well. You don’t want to make enemies in the world of Haberdashery.

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Medium Witch talks to Ghost Witch even when Large Witch, Small Witch, Tiny Witch, and Giant Witch tell her not to.

All of those other sized Witches are probably right. At some point Draco decided Ghost Witch is some sort of Drug Kingpin who ruthlessly slaughtered all her competition until one day when it was decided that her crimes could no longer go unpunished. Despite her final punishment she still runs her operations from beyond the grave, just with a little more restraint. Medium Witch is too young to know about all this but Medium Witch will talk with just about anyone. That’s why she’s a medium.

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Sheep Witch is doing… something? It’s sheep related obviously… She’s cute so you should support her regardless.

Sheep Witch is most likely another sort of Crime Lord. You could call her a wolfsheep in sheep’s clothing. Unlike Ghost Witch, Sheep Witch knows how to keep things on the lamb.

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Cosplay Witch / Candy Corn Weiss.

Draco would say Cosplay Witch takes on the persona of the character she wears and gains their abilities as well. One of the animators at Rooster Teeth liked this one and Draco was pretty thrilled.

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This Witch is a Pie Romancer or as they are more commonly known a pyromancer.

Draco felt possessed when making this one. The idea occurred and then it was done. Pie Romancer has a business but isn’t a criminal like the last few who owned businesses. Not the most hygienic outfit but oh well.

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Romance Witch. Romance is of course shorthand for Roman Centurion. She’s the most romantic from her entire legion.

Draco apparently is too bashful to think of romance in the general sense and must hide that with humor. This one ended up being pretty unpopular and Draco blames the coloring for that. All, a hint, or nothing. That’s what people like. Also this Witch doesn’t really fit the world Draco’s built because of the whole “No Rome” thing. Maybe someone found some outfits in an archaeological dig and started a Roman group of mercenaries or something. Either way she wouldn’t technically be Roman. The same could be said for Cosplay Witch so it’s probably fine.

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Sellout Witch runs too many ads. Sellout Witch is being paid 10,000 cold ones to appear today.

Draco doesn’t know why Draco ended up drawing either a Twitch Streamer or a Camgirl because it’s not like those are inherently sellout-y but it gave the opportunity to make tons of ads which is something a sellout would do. Running ads is fine but something like this isn’t. You ever go on a website and it’s 90% ads despite being perfectly reputable? It’s a turn off and distracts from what you’re trying to do.  Mainly Draco just wanted to do a bunch of funny ads. The chair is Baba Yaga inspired and the vacuum is inspired by Shizuku’s Blinky from Hunter x Hunter. The entire idea is probably inspired by Streaming-chan from Va-11-Hall-A who does come off as a sellout. Being a sellout isn’t always a bad thing.  Also note Draco still hasn’t decided on a currency name. They will however be shaped like triangles.

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Rogue Witch has mastered stealth AND telekinesis. Imagine all that belt money. Wow.

This was a thing you could do in Skyrim. Draco didn’t do much thieving so Draco never did but some of y’all probably did. The warning is there to warn travelers that the potions are too strong and they cannot handle them. The potions would kill them. They can’t handle them.  They should go to a section that sells weaker potions. These are potions that could kill a dragon, let alone a traveler. No one can handle them. They are for the strongest beings. These are potions that can do anything .a mere traveler is too weak and thus they must be warned about these strong potions which they cannot handle.

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Harpy Witch is bullied for being a witch & a harpy by both harpies and witches respectively.

So Harpies in Draco’s world are basically divided into two types. There are the militaristic and needlessly cruel harpies who derive pleasure from the suffering of others. Most of their thoughts are about warfare and torture. They interact with society and fight in the wars of others to take out their aggression. Volunteering to protect others only to satisfy their cruelty. They will respect chain of command but only because the higher-ups have proven that their commands will eventually allow them to inflict great pain on others. Generally they live in smaller weaker areas because those countries, cities, towns, etc have fewer soldiers to steal their kills and more enemies in general. You could say it’s noble to side with the innocent underdogs against the evil empire but not the way they do it.

There is also the other group who would rather not give into their violent impulses and live in the woods with actual birds. The more violent Harpies are actually really supportive of this because it gets them out-of-the-way.

Ultimately though everyone is different and Harpy Witch wants to live in the big city and not torment others. Because Harpies in the big city are known for being jerks the other Witches are wary of Harpy Witch, while the Harpies would prefer Harpy Witch focused on magic with a bit more “wounds that never close”, “blood igniting lasers” or at least work on enchanting magic weapons. .

 

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Please stay still so this witch who is trying her best can practice on you. One more try and she’ll have it for sure!

Draco got very emotional from just the concept of this one. Apparently people doing their best gets Draco right in the heart. Draco wasn’t thinking of Akko but that’s pretty much example prime. Regardless this Witch hasn’t had the easiest time. Basically in this world you want to start learning magic probably around 16 at the earliest. Some people can start whenever and be fine while some people need a significantly later start date. It depends. This Witch tried learning at 14 and received a variety of burns and a large missing chunk of leg for her trouble. Seeing as it isn’t all the uncommon for children to liquefy their insides or self destruct being burned isn’t that bad. Even so none of it has dissuaded her. The initial shock and the permanent damage to her body is holding her back but her attitude will get her through it for sure!

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A Stitched Witch in time can save 9. In fact they’re the only one who can. Good luck.

Stitched Witch was born like this for some reason. She’s works with Haberdasher Witch and sells super strong fireproof thread at the Haberdashery. the stiches on her clothing vary from fashion reasons to holding her body together.

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The Witch with far too many knives could use help carrying her knives. Would you be so kind as to help her carry some?

Basically she only learned magic so she could carry more knives. Soon enough she had so many knives she couldn’t carry them even with magic. Then she got more knives. Her broom is an ax made of knives. Stitched Witch helped her make that by the way. She learned to summon a knife familiar. Why does she like knives so much? Because as a child she saw a knife and liked it.

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Cacti Witch brings the rain but not the umbrellas. Hopefully Friendly Umbrella Witch shows up soon.

Cacti Witch had to be in the traditional cacti pose. This is probably also a genetic thing. Basically in the lore the gods were trying to make what is generally considered fantasy races using trial and error. The acceptable tries got to stay in the above ground and the really far off versions were sent to the underground to prove their usefulness and entertain the gods if they were into that sort of thing.

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Here’s a question for the ages. Which witch is the true Chameleon Witch?

Basically the idea was what would blend in like a chameleon. The leftmost is kind of all Assassin’s Creed blend into the crowd sort but considering no one dresses like that they stand out. The bush would do well in a forest. This is a city. The rightmost is essentially the most generic witch Draco could draw. She has the belt Draco often draws, the hairstyle Draco defaults to, and the shoes are just simple black shoes. If there were cars she would drive a Ford Focus. That’s a common car, right? Nothing on her stands out except maybe the hip flare because Draco is always bad at varying that sort of thing.

One last thing. Some of you probably didn’t notice but right above the bush. Check out that area.

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Fruit Witch… seems fast? She probably as really sugary blood? Enemy of all Medical Witches. She’s an odd one.

The above sums it all up pretty well. Despite the others having their quirks Fruit Witch seems the most unusual to Draco. Also she makes Draco want to draw vampires.

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WikiWitch is able to receive information from some otherworldly encyclopedia directly to their head.

WikiWitch is a sort of Oracle. She essentially has the power to download random Wikipedia articles into her brain. She can also upload information but considering our world and theirs is different most of her uploads will be removed. Well assuming people removed articles like that.

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Android Witch has to stay in peak physical condition to defeat her rival, Apple Witch.

She’s based on Android the operating system for Phones and etc. It’s ok to have a phone since Cyberpunk Witch cleared the way for it. Apple Witch is more like related to the fruit known as apple. Fruit Witch definitely has some sort of authority over Apple Witch.

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According to a drunk scientist and lemmings who’d fool themselves there is no way Bee Witch should be able to fly.

Bee Witch probably wouldn’t die if she stung you. She can fly, but if she were dead, like the bee used to calculate whether bees could fly, she wouldn’t be flying. If you need to tell yourself that scientists are blind to reality using a misconstrued stupid anecdote then you’re blind to reality. That left hand is perhaps the best hand Draco has ever drawn.

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Green Witch is here for renewable solar energy regardless of whether electricity is being used as a power source yet.

Solar energy is great. Wind energy is also great. Deer are great. Deer with knives? Draco won’t complain.

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Caffeinated Witch generally needs 20g of pure caffeine extract each morning. Lately she’s need more.

Draco likes her face. It’s like she is simultaneously younger and older than she is. Draco decided 20g because Draco googled it and someone said 17g will kill the average person. This is just in the morning she has more later. Basically she works with the Super Generic Witch from earlier and they learned how to make body doubles so when Caffeinated Witch say tries to use the restroom, find a seat in the meeting room, or park her broom she finds a bunch of lifeless human paperweights occupying everything. Sometimes it’s even a fire hazard they just leave them in the hallway and no one does anything about it.

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Sand Witch didn’t enjoy this outing. The store clerk had a bucket hat, there was a smelly curtain, and it rained! Sand Witch doesn’t like the rain. It makes her soggy. At least she has her Sandpanion. Conjuring/ summoning magic is the coolest type.Draco has a few cool ones in the wings. Next one does Graffiti summons, another makes body-doubles, and the summoning summoner who summons.

The outfit is inspired by both the outfits in Journey and also Azura from Fire Emblem Fates. The Sandpanions face is inspired by a manga that was cancelled because the author slept with the publishers wife, if Draco remembers correctly. She’d probably be from a town in Eastern Cohavy or Western CynarqolastalidaBgork but at this point she must have moved because all of these witches are living in the same town currently. She probably falls on her face a lot. The real question is “will Sand Witch and her Sandpanion fall in love?”. The answer is probably no. Sandpanion is a simple construct summoned to help Sand Witch with tasks and doesn’t have emotions or a brain. They are made of sand.

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Graffiti Witch will make you her next work of art.

Draco doesn’t know what that means. So threatening. So Graffiti Witch can summon things by painting them. She used to be weaker, being limited to the paint she had but then she made the math nurse looking one who can pull in matter using that needle and convert it to paint for the spray can. Her main weakness is probably being too stylized. Like why do you need a tin monopoly man to get stuff off shelves? Draco’s a fan but it isn’t efficient.

Detective-Witch-Prime

Her methods may be extremely unorthodox but she’s the best Detective Witch we’ve got.

Detective Witch is doing a lot of things wrong. Socks with sandals, leg wear that is neither shorts nor pants, a sweater crop top, glasses that were painted black to look cool, and a bag filled with only candy. Candy’s great but the candy at the bottom never gets eaten. She has spent so long pointing her finger is hard to move. It’s almost like she’s aware that famous detectives always have quirks and so she’s taken on a bunch of aspects to improve her detective skills. If it works it works.

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But is she good enough to solve the MYSTERY WITCH KILLING?

evidence

Here’s some more evidence.

Draco figured a Mystery Witch would need not only a mystery but also a detective and several red herrings. It’s too bad it took Draco so long to decide because Draco totally could have made a game with several endings. Draco might still make that or something like that but not right now. Regardless Draco made a poll asking who people thought it was. Disappointingly the result was a tie between The Victim is the Killer and Sand Witch. Draco has to wonder why these options won. Maybe the evidence should have been labeled. It’s a shame some things had to be cut. Like the suspect interrogations. But funnily enough Sand Witch does mention a “smelly(smelling) curtain.”

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Kinda sad that a bloody sack just hung from the rafters for quite some time without anyone questioning it. Not as sad as the fact that no one as even tried to remove that bucket. It’s been like two weeks.

Regardless the only thing that pointed to Sand Witch was the sand and that could be explained away. it should also be noted that directly underneath the body in the original pic the sand isn’t underneath the body as if that area had been cleaned. Why would Sand Witch only clean that area? You don’t need to worry about blood splatter when you’re just going to publicly display the body. Even if you did have to worry the sand is a dead giveaway to begin with, greater than any splatter.

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Definitely strange.

Admittedly cleaning at all is a bit strange but so is setting up several other people for your crime. Like Detective Witch, Mystery Witch was supposed to be a witch with an obsession for mysteries. None of the setup for this crime makes much sense. Why hang half a body? Why cut the body in half? Why slit the throat or cut up the back? Why burn parts of the body and then dress the body in unburned clothes? So cleaning isn’t all that weird when you think about it. Setup was the goal and setup was done. The key, to solving this mystery, is asking who exactly the victim is.

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You got that right!

Well looking at the jacket and the fact that Draco expects and person to put two and two together it must be someone you’ve seen and the only one with that jacket is Super Generic Witch from earlier. Now for the clues. Next to the trashcan with the bloody tarp in it there is a black something or other which hopefully you can tell is a shoe. It’s shoe shaped! Stitched Witch has a sort of boot that is not black. The Witch with far too many Knives has some sort white mules presumably with knives as the heel bit. Sand Witch has sandals. Four witches have shoes that are just black slip-ons and that’s arguable. We only see some of the shoes in regards to the one witch hiding in the bush and the Assassin’s Creed Style Blend Witch. The Witch trying her best has those shoes but would you call that face a murderer. Actually she is fairly burned and burning your victims wouldn’t be a shocking serial killer mo.

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Darn that’s a good point…

The argument could be made that she isn’t anywhere near tall enough but magic exists and in her pic he is making a variety of floating mistakes. Brooms and ladders both exist and they could easily allow anyone to reach that height.

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But we’ve only just begun.

There are however two pieces of evidence that defend the Witch who tries her best. One piece is that in her pic she is shown as a novice who if looked at objectively fails a lot. Her trying is great and all but the reality is that if she committed the crime there would be more mistakes. As for number two, well Draco didn’t put her on the poll. Draco isn’t a jerk who would just pull a character out of left field as the killer. The killer had to be on the poll. Now someone could say the killer bought these incredibly generic shoes. As for the Witch with far too many Knives, her idiosyncrasies are so severe that her entire life is built around knives. In her pic she is shown moving with so many knives she couldn’t carry them and she was probably moving to a new home with more room for knives. She has such a need to be surrounded by knives that rather than hire people to help carry the remaining knives the next day or perhaps putting some in storage she recruited random people to help asap. Why would she abandon knives? Why would she lose her cool knife shoes? Why would she hand someone she was already stabbing? Lastly why would she be in a shop that doesn’t sell knives to begin with? Considering Mystery Witch is most likely obsessed with mysteries the Mystery Witch probably enjoys all weapons used in murder, It just doesn’t fit. That’s why she was the obvious red herring and only one person picked her. As for Stitched Witch, she has to tie her shoes to her pants otherwise her feet will fall off. Her hands just kind of hang there most of the time so hanging the body and making the cuts to the back would be difficult. The would certainly be less uniform. If Stitched Witch was the killer why would there be any need for knives. Assuming she has the ability to get someone up there the knives wouldn’t really be needed. On top of that why would either of them need to burn the face and fingertips? The only real reason for that would be to hide the identity and the only suspect from the poll who fits that description would be the victim.

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I think we’re almost there!

The victim who doesn’t have any blatant interests. The one that annoys Caffeinated Witch with the essentially human paperweights she leaves everywhere.

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You’re the only one!

If you remember her first appearance, she was actually part of a mystery.  Mystery Witch may be able to blend into a crowd but through and through she is Mystery Witch.

Mystery-Witch

 

Luck for her, killing a non-sentient body double she created isn’t even slightly illegal. At worst she wasted everyone’s time. If the vote had been in her favor instead of a tie she might have faced any sort of consequences for her actions but that’s neither here nor there. Some of the blame may rest on Draco but then again Draco has always said the first guess should always be the dead body. If you’re ever in one of those “trapped in a mansion with a serial killer” scenarios  just chop off their head. Yeah it’s gross but they are “dead” and if they aren’t well they were planning on murdering everyone including you anyway. The number of times the theory is wrong is outshone by the times you’ll be miraculously right. That wouldn’t have helped in this mystery but it’s something to keep in mind. Normally mysteries don’t take place in worlds where magic exists. Some would say body doubles are a cop-out but Draco introduced the concept in the most “this is a clue” way possible and played by the rules Draco had previously established. Draco honestly thought it was going to be too easy but oh well. Next year the mystery might be so convoluted not even Draco will know it’s a mystery.  Or has the next mystery already begun? Technially it has, but not in a realistic or practical way.

 

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